WHATEVER PILLS WE HAVE IN THE CUPBOARD.

y'know what we never did take all those photos. we took one, and it is stuck at amy's house, so my blog is yet again deprived of pretty (or not so pretty in our cases!) photos. so you can have a picture of my sister lucy being gay, it made me laugh so much. i can't really remember but i think she describes it as 'her pretending to be a dinosaur.'
had a fantastic weekend, shopped for england, spent a whole lot of money, used my card for the first time. i had a catch up with my mates since i haven't seen them for like three weeks! then had a great day out with charles [:
we bumbled down to xscape and watched 'observe & report' omigosh! i remembered the name for once! it was so funny. "you, saddam huissain from iraq!"
now my hair is falling out in clumps and i'm not even exaggerating. i think it's cos i'm stressed, i have no idea why, well a few. but nothing really important. what if i become bald and ugly and have to wear a scarf on my head? oh feck if i do i'm overdosing on whatever pills we have in the cupboard.

RANDOM OUTBURST THERE.

so it's the end of the first week, work experience is way better than schoool. no work to do apart from a few errands. though i have to interview a few people, gawwd.
progress review day yesterday-
i have to ask 2 teachers how i can do better. i really don't want to because i'm a laid back person and i think oh shit as long as i pass.
when i leave i'll miss the kiddys, never though i'd say that did you?
FUCK THE WORLD, I'M DOING WHAT I WANT.
random outburt there, paha you're gay.
my blog entries are becoming so wasteful and boring now, with no pictures.
oh shit my music just came on loud and burst my eardrums. anyways yeah this weekend will be immense since i'm shopping all day saturday, then babysitting, then sunday cinemas with my bf charlieeeeox

I AM WELL BEHAVED, SOMETIMES.

a couple of days ago i could have filled the grand canyon with all the poo i had been shitting my pants with. [NOT LITERALLY.] yes work experience, didn't want to do it - but unfortunatley it's essential. fekkin' goverment these days.
on a misty monday morning [alliteration!] i got on the new bus - which is terrible and i hate it. as i walked up to the school i felt like running away but i went in because i am well behaved, well sometimes, and it was fine. absolutley fine. i do this all the time, i worry about pointless things and they always turn out to be alright, i'm a loserrrr. HAHA.
got guitar again on thursday, another thing i worried about a few weeks ago, but hey hoe i like it now! woo that is a first, i have decided that even if my arms get amputated i am not qutting for i quit everything else that i ever did including horse riding. but that one wasn't my fault AS WE ALL KNOW MENTIONING NO NAMES.
i'm just rambling now, AUFWIEDERSEHN KINDER!

BATTLE OF THE BANDS.

last night was the night i had been waiting upon for quite some time, it was quite amazing.
yes i am on about battle of the bands.
five bands fighting against each other to get to the final,and the band me and my group of friends were supporting [recruitment 46] went through!
we had a good rave especially at the end, even if i got sprayed with water and my foot trod on (:
slept at ashleighs; met her new guinea pigs - so sweet.
so yeah basically had a good few days.

WHY THE FUCK AM I TALKING TO MY BLOG?

thoughts and ideas are swirling around in my head, i need to write them down, but then i feel stupid. my brain is a factory of ideas and i cannot control it.
i need my hair doing so desperatley, by professionals, i need a stylist. my guitar needs to be played properly, i've practised the same song over and over, WHEN IS IT NOT NEXT THURSDAY BUT THE ONE AFTER THAT?!
oh godzz (btw i have taken to writing z's at the end of unspecific words, god it gets on my nerves.) i actually need to exercise, my own mother said i was getting squidgier. feck, someone help me? i don't only need a stylist but i need a personal trainer as well!
only one week left of the holidays and i'm dreading work experience, for no particular reason. i'm just a worrying person. i should have grey hair and wrinkles.
oh poo, i want a digital camera. 10 mega pixels please? i love photography, my sister accuses me of thinking i know everything, maybe it's just my creative side.
BRIGHT SPARK IDEA!! i just gained £55, maybe i could get a good one for that if i put more towards it? hang on WHY THE FUCK AM I TALKING TO MY BLOG?!

SO YEAH WHATEVER FLOATS YA BOAT.

well for your benefits, not that i really care about some randomers who have randomally found my blog in the middle of a loads of foreigners, i have decided to update you. mainly because i don't want people thinking i'm a total suicidal emo who lives in a world of darkness, or that i'm a moody bitch who only thinks about herself and is so absorbed in her own life and misery that she wouldn't notice if a bus ran over her gran 200 metres away from her.
yeah i'm not that;
i'm beth.

so yeah i'm happy now, and this sounds so cliché but music made me better, and no not locking myself in a room listening to my battered ipod.
no, playing my guitar for 2+ hours and being actually quite good, if i say so myself. and i've had backing from that! i've found something that i can actually be good at, and it makes me happy. so yeah whatever floats ya boat.

I'M A HAPPY PERSON. SOMETIMES.

y'know what, i need motivation, my life needs sorting and so does my bush of a head.
what am i going to do about it? probably nothing, but that's not the point.
something has been pissing me off lately, but i don't know quite what.
i just hate it that in this world you have to be the same to be accepted and this sounds like i have been not accepted in some way, but actually what set me off was one of my friends dps on msn.
i hate the way people copy each other, why cannot there be some frikkin' originality! FFS!
yeah okay rant over;
and also i'm pissed off with my pathetic self. i feel like everything i do is wrong, i have no purpose because i have no talents and i cannot do anyhing right.

btw i'm not suicidal.
& i am happy person. sometimes.

SHOCK FUCKING HORROR.

i'm writing on here less these days, because maybe i don't want everyone noseying in on my life.
i don't actually see the point in the people who's blogs go like this-
"well, today i got up and made some toast, but the sell by date on the marmalade was from last year."
shock fucking horror! i suggest you invest in some more marmalade then.
easter holidays. what a farce, sitting on my chair gaining lbs by the second. i need to live in a place where things actually happen, such as next door to michael jackson. um no.
tata for now m'ladies.